Stay
by fromthehillbythelake
Summary: Words, or lack of them, are a tricky thing. JATIE oneshot. An old oneshot I'm just transferring from my tumblr to here.


**I'm just transferring this from my tumblr to fanfiction :)**

**How I feel the interaction between Jake and Katie should have gone last night, because good lordy, it was so OOC. Jake and Mo were wonderful during their other scenes, but this one just irked me:**

* * *

"Lemme get this straight. You wanna apologize for being a-"

"Mo!" Marisol interrupts, her eyes wide and warning.

"Almost," Mo answers, pointing across the table, "but with an H instead of an M." He looks at Katie. "Ho."

It's silent, and Katie looks back at Mo, her mouth falling open in anger. She's too shocked to form a response.

"Mo!" Marisol snaps. "She's my _best_ friend, you can't talk to her like that!"

Mo looks a bit taken back, but glances over at Jake still laughing. His awkward laughter putters out when he realizes that Jake isn't laughing with him.

"Is something funny?" Katie bites out, her tone venomous. Mo continues to laugh, but it sounds sort of like choking at this point.

"Ahh, no-" he says red-faced, looking between Jake and Katie, "just curious Katie. Are you going to put 'pro' on your resume?"

Marisol shakes her head at him, her nose pointed angrily.

"Are you referring to prostitution?" Katie snarks, speaking over whatever Marisol was going to say.

"Yeah-" Mo replies, but his voice is deflated and he looks slightly ashamed.

Katie's anger boils over, heating her skin. She's angry because boys still think these medieval standards of women are acceptable, she's angry because society still condones it, she's angry at Mar because she knows her friend will sit with Mo tomorrow at lunch, she's angry because she really does like Mo, she's mostly angry at herself for getting them in this mess…but she's furious at the boy she loved - _loves_ - who's sitting there like he doesn't know this is killing her.

"_Ahh_," Katie mocks Mo, "no. Because I didn't sleep with anyone."

Jake finally looks at her, his face stricken with what looks a lot like guilt and regret and maybe a little bit of tenderness. She can't tell though, because she's glaring at Mo now. Marisol puts a hand on her arm.

"I'm just trying to apologize," Katie scoffs, covering up her quivering lip with bitter anger. And when nobody answers her, she pushes her chair back to leave. She isn't one to make a scene - she'd kill anyone who embarrassed her in public - but the tears are coming, hot and wet, and she needs to get out of here.

Jake's jaw clenches like he wants to say something, and she almost laughs. He's always silent when she needs him to speak.

She knows the thought is cruel and unfair, but she needs him and he can't find the words to make her stay.

With her eating disorder, her tearing her ACL, her pill addiction, her mom's MS, her not being able to go to Stanford, her sister losing Cam - he can't even open his damn mouth.

"I hope she feels better," he says quietly to Mo after she leaves, Marisol in toe. Without a hint of malice or hate, he truly does. And it's all he can offer her.

* * *

-x-

_"I have three rules," he drawled when Katie asked to smoke with him one time. "One: only do it with people you trust. Two: don't push it on anyone. And three: don't be an idiot about it."_

_She looked at him. "I trust you."_

_"Mari-jew-wanna?" he asked, holding out the joint to her. She giggled._

-x-

Well, he's breaking rule number three, smoking up in his pick-up truck before school starts.

-x-

_"Forget about her maaaaaaaannee," Mo sing-songed in a Jamaican accent the other night while they passed joints. Eli looked up at him under hooded lashes on the floor. Jake didn't look back - he knew Eli could crack it out of him, especially when they were high._

_"She boinked another bro…for monayyyy!" Mo went on, lolling about on the couch. "She's a ho man. A ho!"_

_Jake chucked the remote control directly at Mo's face. It bounced off him with a satisfying CLUNK._

_"She's not a ho," Jake growled. "She's not, Mo."_

_Jake was about to knock the 'I-just-ate-glue' look off Mo's face when Eli cackled with laughter._

_"You rhymed," he giggled. "You rhymed, bitch."_

_And the boys laughed. Laughed and laughed until their sides felt like they were going to fall out; Jake grateful that Eli provided him with that save._

-x-

"Bitch," Jake mutters now, taking another drag.

He thinks he's had a blow everyday for two weeks now, but can't really recall. He remembers when it used to be about every other week, give or take.

This isn't as fun as it used to be.

He's got about ten minutes till the bell rings, and till he meets up with Mo and Eli for some video games. But he really just wants to drive home.

He sees Katie getting out of the passenger seat of Marisol's car through his dusty truck windshield, Maya clambering out the back. She's focused and lively, her arm linked with her younger sister's. He isn't watching - it's not like he misses her - but he can't help being distracted by her curtain of dark hair swaying in the sunlight. He remembers what it felt like in his hands. He wants to touch her.

_Fuck this, fuck school, fuck everything_. He's suddenly so angry he slams his fist onto the dashboard, the impact shaking his bones. Only she could do this to him.

"Bitch," he mutters again, snuffing the joint out and chucking it in the back. He ruffles through his backback to spray on some cologne, ridding himself of any evidence. His cell vibrates, and he knows it's either Mo or Eli telling him to move his ass. He takes a shallow breath before exiting his truck, a soft smirk pulling at his lips.

* * *

-x-

Jake knows Katie won't be sitting with them at lunch today. He's not sure they'll sit together again. Marisol goes on about her nails and shoes and Mo pokes fun at her. Their banter is easy and familiar, and he falls into step, laughing too. He picks at his lunch: a chicken sandwich, apple, pop, brownie. None of it is appetizing, especially the chicken.

Out of the corner of his eye, he catches Katie giving Maya a hug. _Siblings_ used to be a foreign concept to him. It was always just him, his dad, and…his mom. But living with Clare now, and visting the Matlins so often, he doesn't think he could ever have just _one_ kid.

_"But who's going to look after her when I'm gone?"_ Katie asked him once. It still haunts him time to time.

Marisol brings up Prom and Jake smiles through the stiffness that rakes up his arms. _Matlin_ and _Martin_. They'll be close together at Graduation regardless, Mo in between them.

Marisol starts giggling excitedly about dresses, but she stops herself, looking over in Katie's direction.

Mo laughs to lighten the mood. "Thank God guys just get to wear a tux. It would kill me having to try on all those dresses. And the shoes and the hair? Crazy." He looks over at Jake, punching his friend's arm for approval.

"Well then, maybe I won't take you dress shopping with me," Marisol smiles demurely, reaching for Mo's hand across the table.

Jake knows the thought is cruel and unfair, but he almost snaps at Marisol to take Katie instead. They're best friends after all.

But he's just the stoner kid in the background, who doesn't talk and doesn't cause waves. His silence is deafening. He doesn't remember when it became a problem; it used to be his solace.

_"…because I didn't sleep with anyone."_

He thought she gave his touch to someone else. And would it have really mattered if she did? She had his heart; his touch was always on her, in her, a part of her.

_"…because I didn't sleep with anyone."_

He needs her and he can't even find the words to make her stay.

* * *

**-x-**


End file.
